Finding the will…again.

Here I am once again trying to find the resolve to lose weight. I’ve posted on this many times before, but right now I’m feeling very low, maybe lower than I’ve ever felt before about it.  I have been trying to lose weight almost my whole life. The other week I texted my mom and asked her “What happened to me when I started gaining weight? I wasn’t always chubby. I remember being “normal”. Now it seems like something that will never happen for me.” I don’t remember the exact age but it was somewhere in between 2nd-4th grade. People said “its just baby fat, when puberty hits you’ll slim down.” Needless to say that didn’t happen. It must’ve been 4th grade, because that’s when we moved and I distinctly remember seeing one of my old neighbors (a grown man, not another kid) and when I got out of the car he said “dang, what happened to you girl”, in response to my weight gain. I remember writing in my diary “if I’m not this weight, by this time, I’m going to become a bulimic.” I’ve thought that as an adult too, but I’ve never been able to go through with it. I guess that means I’m not too bad off.

I see so many friends having success with their health and fitness journeys, some vegan, some not. I just think “what’s the missing link for me?” It can’t be just because I’m a working mother, because there are those doing it too. A couple months ago someone from one of the many health and fitness groups I’ve joined on facebook reached out to me and asked if I’d be interested in having her as a trainer. I said,  “I’m already working with someone and I’m not sure what you can do for me other than slap food out of my hand”. We messaged back and forth, because I just didn’t want to shut her down, until I was comfortable just not replying again. A little while later she made a post saying there’s no excuse for people not to be within a healthy BMI. She commented that she could weigh 140 something pounds and still not be overweight…blah, blah, blah. Here I am somewhere over 200, again, and haven’t been 140 something pounds since middle school. So yeah, that made me feel great, and certainly regreatful that I did not seek her services. That was sarcasm. I’d have to lose over 60 pounds to not be overweight. Before I had my son I sat right on the edge of overweight and obese and fluncuated between 170-185. I had gotten back to 180 within 2 years of having Xavier, but then the weight started to creep back. I’ve seen friends literally losing multiple hundreds of pounds, and I haven’t been able to keep 10 off for the past 2 years. Every day, every hour, probably every minute, I’m thinking about losing weight. I am just thankful I don’t have a husband that gets on me about it, I swear the little bit of self confidence that I have would just wither away into dust.  He helps me and encourages me the best he can, but it all comes down to me.

I had the will power a couple times in my adult life. The first time I lost a significant amount of weight was in college. I wanted to be a physical therapist, but the death of my cousin led me down the path of teaching Health and Physical Education. I was a part of a “Biggest Loser” challenge on campus, and I did well. The weight stayed off for a while, but I got back to where I started, eventually. The second time was, as I said before, after I had my son. Even after I quit breastfeeding, I continued to stick to my healthy eating and exercise and the weight kept falling off. I lost over 50 pounds! Then for some reason I stopped, and was never able to consistantly get back into it since then. Everyday I am in front of students telling them why they should be healthy I feel like they are laughing at me. Someone in my family literally died as a direct cause of morbid obesity, even still I have trouble preventing the same outcome for myself.

I’m in a fitness group that does challenges from time to time, I’ve never been able to even stick with consistant clean eating and working out for the 1, 2, or 4 week challenges. Today the trainer asked us to make a goal and stick to it. I made the goal, but I’m really not sure what has to happen to make me stick to it, and see success again; hopefully once and for all.

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Healthy.Nappy.Nerdy.Mommy. Update.

marvel cap running
Out for a 2 mile jog.

So its been a LONG time since my last post. Over NINE MONTHS to be exact. I think the same thing happened last year. I started strong, but once the school year got going, (I’m a teacher), I fizzled off, then got going again during the summer. I am going to try really, really, hard to stay active with my blogging. I enjoy it, and I’ve been told a time or two that I’m good at it. My page started to get some traction and I want to keep it going. Here’s a little bit of what’s been happening with the Healthy Nappy Nerdy Mommy, and what’s to come.

Healthy

I’ve been doing some rollercoastering in this department. Pretty much for the same reason I stopped blogging….life. I’ve gained 30 pounds since my lowest after having my son, 4 YEARS AGO. Its not baby weight anymore, its just plain weight. If I gain 30 pounds again, I’ll be back to the weight I was after I left the hospital with him. I’ve got to get back in gear. Exercise is not my problem. Since rejoining the YMCA, I usually workout 90 minutes to over 2 hours at least 4 times a week. I know it is nutrition. I have been trying to follow mostly a Whole Food Plant Based lifestyle. That’s a step further than vegan. It means no meat, no dairy, no eggs, no refined sugar, no white flour, and no oil. At first glance you see all the things I can’t have, but there are so many better things I CAN have. I love fruits and vegetables. I also love cooking, so I am definantly capable of doing this. I’ve seen videos on Facebook of these women that look so young and vibrant into old age. I want that for myself and my family. My ultimate goal is to have an organic garden and cook most of our food from our own backyard.  As Physical and Health Education teacher I have to be able to talk the talk and walk the walk. My body, animals, and enviornment will be better off as well.

Nappy

I started locs. I’ve thought about for a while. Last summer when I cut my hair it was a step towards this. I could’ve done it without cutting my hair, and part of me wishes I had, but I think I am going to enjoy the process of growing my locs from baby twist. Last summer I cut my hair to a fade, in December I cut it down low, and in April I started locs with finger coils from that growth. I started them on my own first. I did like the results and tried again with my husband’s help. I helped me part the hair horizontally, to make sure there was some uniformity. I don’t want perfect locs, but I also want some neatness to them. We shall see what this journey brings.

Nerdy

Most recently, and I mean VERY recently. I’ve gotten back into Pokemon Go. I started playing it when it came out 2 years ago, and fell off. Two days ago my husband and I started playing again. I did my first raid and my first micro transation within a game. I’m excited because I’ve never been a gamer before, aside from pressing buttons repetitively on some fighter games. I have been of course continuing to watch Anime. We’ve been watching My Hero Academia, Borotu, and Black Clover. We also started One Piece. It is an old anime that neither my husband nor I had ever watched. We also, started watching Sword Art online again. I was not blogging when all the Black Panther and Avengers: Infinity War mania was fresh. I’m not going to backtrack and do seperate post, I am just going to say that I though both were AMAZING. As a Blerd or Black Nerd, I was more than ecstatic about what Black Panther brought to the table. As a marvel fan period Infinity War was pure gold. Every summer, save the one right after having our son, we’ve gone to Otakon. I am not sure if we will go to Otakon this year. But I know we will be going the Raleigh Supercon.   Moving foward you can look to hearing about more Pokemon Go, Anime, and movies.

Mommy

Our son is 4 now; we have moved out of the Troublesome Three’s. Night time potty training is much better, although not perfect. I am told things don’t really taper off until 6, and that 6-10 are the best years. God, I can’t wait for that. This boys is really driving me crazy. I love him though, as coo coo for coco puffs as he is. This year I hope to get him into a Pre-K program. Either way I will be making sure he is ready for Kindergarten. As he’s gotten older he has shown many gifts and interest. He likes singing and dancing. He also seems very inquistive and into nature. Any anybody who know myself or him, knows he is a ball of endless energy. I may have a musician, athlete, or scientist in the making. I can’t wait to see what he is interested in. I have no intentions of making him conform to anything. Whatever his niche is, I will nuture it to the fullest.

Of course there’s been more happening in the past 9 months, but I didn’t want to ramble on and on, plus some of it deserves it’s own post. Here’s hoping I can keep things going. What are some changes or updates that’ve happened with you?

The Week My Son Turned 3

March 14th, 2014, I was blessed with a 8 lbs 8 oz bundle of joy. This past Tuesday we celebrated the 3rd anniversary of his birth. We were originally supposed to have a big birthday party with about 20 family and friends in our hometown. Recently, we have been experiencing some car trouble and were unsure if they’d get fixed within the week to host said party, so we cancelled the bash. This week ended up being filled with celebration, exhaustion, and accomplishments. Here are the details.

car's 3rd birthday cake

Monday was regular enough except for the planning and preparation for the little get together we had in lue of the big birthday bash. I bought some juice, muffins, and made goody bags to leave at his daycare. I think its really sweet that his daycare teacher plans things for their birthday. When I told her the previous day that his birthday was tomorrow, she calmly replied “I know”. I’m not sure how typical it is for daycare providers to know and make plans for each child’s birthday, but I think that’s really special. Even if I had got too busy or something, Ana had it covered. Whenever I asked him what he wanted for his birthday, for the past month, his respond had been “strawberries”.  I made a cake that was strawberry with confetti icing, and bought 2 pounds of frozen strawberries for his party that evening. Since its not strawberry season yet, I didn’t want to risk getting fresh ones. His party was supposed to be Disney’s “Cars” Themed. That week he started asking for a “Mator” and “Lightening McQueen”, so that night a Walmart, I found a Lightening McQueen T-shirt, wear that day, a Mator toy with a suction cup that allows him to actually tow (it doesn’t work that well), and a small Lightening McQueen toy that came with a set of race tracks. I was trying to decide whether or not I wanted to make the cake that night, but I decided to wait until I got out of school so it would be fresh.

 

Tuesday was his big day, and while it is usually a struggle getting him out of the bed today he woke up excited for his “cupcakes” (muffins) at daycare and his McDonald’s party with Mator and Lightening McQueen. I invited my sister and his two cousins, and a friend of mine at work with her family, she has two kids as well. I baked the cake, but didn’t have a lot of time to let it cool, so it was covered with a glaze. It was still tasty. I called in to McDonald’s and ordered sweet tea, mcnuggets, fries, and mcdoubles for the group. I would sneak next door to get a burrito bowl from Chipotle, since there aren’t any viable vegan options at McDonald’s. We sang the Stevie Wonder version of “Happy Birthday”, because for the past 2 years he cried when we sang the original. I discovered slow songs make him sad. He cries at other parties, as well as when he wear “Silent Night”. He enjoyed the new rendition and asked me to sing again when I was putting him to bed that night. This party was a great success. That was the party I originally planned to have, but as the date got closer I couldn’t resist doing the usually over the top family celebration. I’m not happy to need car repairs, but maybe it was for the best, because Xavier couldn’t have been more ecstatic.

The birthday part was over so I could relax, right…..wrong. I volunteered to be in our school musical, Suessical, as “The Cat and the Hat”. I absolutely enjoyed participating with the kids, but it was just horr

me as "the cat in the hat"
Me as “The Cat in the Hat”

ible timing. So I would have 4 performances in the next 3 days, and I did not know my lines yet. The kids would ask me during class….”Mrs. Marshall, do you know your lines yet?” I’d reply “Don’t worry about my lines, worry about actually singing out.” I did learn them relatively well enough to ad lib and not through everybody off. I was The Cat in the Hat, so it was my job to say off the wall stuff. We had performances after school at 6 pm Wednesday and Thursday, and two on Friday during the day.  There was a morning performance Friday for the neighboring elementary school and that afternoon for our middle school student body. All the kids were most nervous to perform in front of all their peers, and to be honest so was I. Friday I had more than one person say to me “I know you’re glad it over, you look tired”. I would say, “gee, thanks”.

 

The day of Thursday performance I was not at work because my son had his 3 year well visit. At this visit the doctor diagnosed him with……Asthma. It seems his stomach bugs that he’s been getting for the past year are probably reactions to food allergies, and his cough that he’s had for the past couple weeks are asthma. The doctor started putting the pieces together as I was telling her about all the different symptoms, paired with the family history of my allergies, my father’s asthma, and a listen to his chest which reveal wheezing. He has also had eczema since he was a baby. They all pointed to asthma. He has an appointment with an allergist to find possible triggers and a follow up with his pediatrician in two weeks.  So his belated birthday gift from the doctor was an inhaler and spacer. He’s sometimes reluctant to let me use it. So I showed him a few cartoons of Baine using the mask with medicine to give him muscles of powers, and that did the trick.

3 years vs 9 months well visit
3 years vs 9 months-well visit

I was informed by my cousin that my sister and mother were planning a surprise visit since we couldn’t come up there this weekend. I’m glad she let me know, because that kind of surprise was the last thing I needed this week. Once I knew about it, I was happy. I’m always happy to visit or get a visit from my family. But had I not known I would not have been able to clean and make sure my home was presentable; rather than lake a tornado, blizzard, hurricane, all dropped at once. To top it all off, I never did get those car repairs. It just wasn’t the week to have to coordinate dropping off and picking up a car. Along with either renting or borrowing a car while my was getting repairs. I know that shaking, smoking smell, check engine light flashing is really, really bad, but the mechanic said I could drive on it, so I’ll handle it next week when to dust had settled.

So yes, my son turned 3. And I could not be more happy and proud of the young man he is becoming. Being a mother never gets easy, but just like this week we will all get through it, somehow, together.

 

One Lovely Blog Award

I was nominated for the One Lovely Blog Award. Thank you so much to Apunkwithms for this honor. If you haven’t already, please visit her page, its awesome.

One Lovely Blog

Rules

  • Thank the person that nominated you and leave a link to their blog
  • Post about the award
  • Share seven facts about yourself
  • Nominate at most 15 people
  • Tell your nominees the good news

7 Facts about Me

  1. I want a really big dog like a Great Dane, Newfoundland, or Saint Bernard, so I can name him Hagrid.
  2. I enjoy going to Walmart early on a Saturday or Sunday morning to grocery shop.
  3. Right now I have an obsession with Colourpop lippie sticks. (Ultra Matte, Matte X, and Ultra Satin)
  4. My favorite musical artist are Alicia Keys, Jill Scott, and Bruno Mars.
  5. I am currently almost done watching Dragon Ball Z for the first time ever!
  6. My favorite food is avocado.
  7. The only place outside the U.S. I’ve been is Costa Rica. 😢

My Nominees

naturalprideblog

billziegler1947

Jean

Middle American Geekery 

Healthy Lifestyle Changes

Nerd Rambles 

Lesley’s Anime and Manga Corner

deb’s pots

Your Very Own RD

Small Things Bring Big Joy!!!

Thank you for reading. Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

Our Curly Hair Family

For about the past 1.5 years everyone in my household has been rocking their natural curls. My journey started in the summer of 2009 when I started transitioning, I did the big chop in December. My son was born and he has not had the “coming of age” hair cut of African American boys at the age of 1 or 2. My husband is multi-racial and pretty much because nobody knew another way, he always got low haircuts, like black men he was surrounded by. Since September of 2015 he’s grown it out. He didn’t even know his hair curled before that. We’ve all had our own separate journeys in this process, but I have major pride for my curly haired family.

Me

My path as naturalista is pretty steadfast and permanent. I have no intentions of going back to the creamy crack. I have however, though of getting locks. Although, I would still be natural, I wouldn’t be able to show off my curly texture. I have seen people that have taken their locks out, I used to think the only way to not have locks anymore was to cut them off. At least now I know that if it did choose to lock my hair I wouldn’t have to cut all my growth and although it would be a laborious process, I would comb them out and have my curls back. Yay! I think I will make that transition, either when I am grey or if my husband and son cut their hair.

My Husband

My husband is happy with his curls. I think its a part of him realizing and accepting his heritage. His curls are soft, shiny, and thick. When he first started growing his hair we though it would be wavy, but as it grew longer to our surprise it started to curl into these thick rings. I LOVE his hair and hope he doesn’t cut it short again, but he gets frustrated when it is hot and hanging on his neck. I have also found that he is very particular about his hair, we just didn’t know before because it was always so low maintenance.  Now if it isn’t curling or falling the way he likes he thinks its a mess. I think it glorious however. I wish he would rock his man bun or pony, but he is convinced it isn’t long enough yet. I’ll get him when its time for Otakon though, he won’t be able to resist wearing a samurai top knot.

My Son

My son has been growing his hair since birth. Once he really started growing hair, he has shown a lot of growth. He always had curls, but I think at 1.5 years they really started to turn into the cute bouncy curls he has now. My students say he looks like Corbin Blue. I will keep growing his hair until he gets older. I’d say at least by 2nd or 3rd grade and if he wants it cut, I’ll get it cut. Although, even if its cut, I’d prefer if he kept an inch or 2 to still have curls. We did go through I brief moment of weakness, when we wanted to cut his hair on his 3rd birthday, coming up next month. He was getting so fussy each night when I had to wash and detangle it. I had to co-wash it every other night, otherwise it would look wild and unruly. I did figure out a system that would work. I started washing his hair on Sundays and doing box braids. He wears the braids for 2-3 days, then I take them out. He wears his defined curls a couple of days. Once they reached the end of their road I’ll put his hair in a bun or ponytail. One day I will learn to cornrow, but for now he gets that done when we’re visit my mom or if his aunt does it.

This spring we HAVE to take some family photos to show off these wonderful head of coils. I’m not sure what the future holds for us. I do know that at the very least my son and husband will grow their hair until its long enough to donate to Locks of Love. Until then I will enjoy us being a beauty bouncy curled family. Whatever everyone’s choices or preferences we’ll be a beautiful family not matter what.

The Versatile Blogger Award

versatile-blogger

I was nominated for the Versatile Blogger Award by msliladiary. Thank you so much for this honor and recognition. Please check her out if you haven’t already.  Its always great to support others and show that you care about what they do. That you so much. Now its my turn to do the same for some others.

7 Facts about Me

  1. I am allergic to wheat, dairy, eggs, and peanuts.
  2. I am trying to be vegan, but I cheat occasionally on sweets and if I am cooking bacon for the rest of my family.
  3. My favorite superhero is X-men’s Storm.
  4. I was once a Zumba Fitness Instructor.
  5. I teach middle school physical and health education
  6. My favorite types of foods are Mexican and Asian
  7. I know how to play the viola and string bass, but I’m a little rusty. I brush up and perform with my students when they have concerts occasionally.

My 15 Nominees

TJ Luvs Being Natural 

avocadogypsy

Ally xoxo

Live.Simple.Good

NaptasticCoils

Dandy Daryl 

The Culinary Chronicles

The Identity Thieves

What’s 4 Dinner Solutions 

LemonVinaigrette 

Nerds4LifeBlog

Fabulous Frugality

Tales of the Mind

Fantasy and Anime

The Comfortable Coop

The Rules

  •  Thank the person who gave you this award. That’s common courtesy.
  •  Include a link to their blog. That’s also common courtesy — if you can figure out how to do it.
  •  Next, select 15 blogs/bloggers that you’ve recently discovered or follow regularly. ( I would add, pick blogs or bloggers that are excellent!)
  •  Nominate those 15 bloggers for the Versatile Blogger Award — you might include a link to this site.
  •  Finally, tell the person who nominated you 7 things about yourself.

As always, I hope you enjoy!

Mystery Blogger Award

mba

Another one (in DJ Khaled voice). This is absolutely crazy to get my second award, and  within a week of my first. I am so thankful for the recognition. Thank you so much to Queen Nique for nominating me.

 

Here are the Rules:

  • Display Award logo on blog
  • List The Rules
  • Mention Creator Of Award & Provide A Link
  • Thank The Blogger(s) Who Nominated You & Provide A Link
  • Say 3 Things About Yourself
  • Nominate From 10 To 20 Bloggers
  • Notify Nominated Bloggers By Leaving A Comment On Their Blog
  • Answer 5 Questions From Nominee
  • Write 5 Questions For Your Nominees
  • Share Your Best Post

Thank you so much to the creator of this award, Okoto Enigma! Its a great chance for bloggers to put themselves out their and learn and grow from others. 

3 Things About Me:

  1. I love to cook, especially adapting recipes for my many allergies, and healthy lifestyle.
  2. I am a physical and health education teacher. I dedicate my life to helping students learn to live healthy active lives. I try to make a different each day.
  3. I love my family. Even though we may get on each others nerves and my son is a huge handful, I cherish every moment I get to have with them.

5 Questions from my nominator:

1. What motivated you to start blogging? It was something I felt like I could do for me and enjoy it. My husband has his games and now I have my blog. Its a bonus that I can help people along the way. 
2. Where is your favorite place to travel? I don’t get a lot of opportunities to travel, but if I could go anywhere it would be Japan. My favorite place that I’ve actually been would be Orlando, Florida. There’s so much there from Disney to Universal Studios.  
3. What is one major accomplishment you have made since blogging? Learning how to open up to people, and realize that I have good ideas and experiences that people seem to want to know about. 
4. What is you favorite type of music? 80s, 90s, early 2000 R&B/Hip Hop
5. How would you describe yourself in 3 words? Why? Well Rounded-I am adventurous with my experiences and outlook on people and life. Mellow- I am typically not very excitable either positively or negatively. Which can be a blessing or a curse. Wonder Woman- I am not trying to be narcissistic, but I joggle a lot and I am told I handle it quite well. In the past I did not like Wonder Woman or any DC character for that matter, but I have come to appreciate and identify with what she represents. I think anybody who handles their business should consider themselves a superhero.  

Nominees:

The Cheergerm & the Silly Yak

Comicnewbies

Michel Nilles- Vegan Food Lover

theroosevelthome

5 Questions for My Nominees:

  1.  What is your greatest strength?
  2. What is your greatest weakness?
  3. What character (movie, cartoon, anime, comic, etc.) do you most identify with and why?
  4. What is your favorite type of cuisine?
  5. What would you like to be your life’s work/biggest accomplishment?

 Best Post: My Kind of Nerd

Although this post doesn’t have the most views, likes, or comments; it was a blog I wrote early on that got a lot of attention. It is also, I post that I am very opening and intimate with readers about my insecurities. I hope you enjoyed it too.

Thanks Again.